Foreword

Greetings! I'm Molly. This is my first blog experience and I'm pretty dang excited about it. There are a variety of reasons why I've decided to embark on this pseudo-assignment.
I'd like to make it clear that I am not an aspiring photographer, and I don’t pretend to be. Some of my closest friends and family are exceptionally talented in that area, but I can’t say it has ever been a genuine passion of mine.
Onto business. Recently, many of my Facebook friends caught my attention with albums titled “30 day challenge”, in which they followed a list of topics via photos that defined them. All of this for a period of - you guessed it - 30 days. I wanted to pursue this in my own way by making my own ‘list’. (Side note, I have planning this for the past few weeks; likely driving my roommate crazy by scrawling ideas onto paper in the middle of the night.) Regardless, I am excited for my ideas to come to fruition, and truly hope it turns out the way I have been imagining it. I invite you to leave comments on anything I post. I have always been a firm believer that knowing what everyone else thinks, does, in fact, matter. It puts things into perspective and allows us to be well-rounded individuals, which is definitely a quality I would hope to be recognized as.
One primary hesitation I have about this project is ultimately how self-centered it is. Completely. It can be chalked up to self-expression, art, or anything else… but in the end, things like this are primarily concerned with “me” and “I”. I struggle with this in an age of social media. Since the time I had a Myspace at age 16, I began this practice (we began this practice) of showcasing ourselves and finding endless ways to portray how unique we were. With Facebook and Twitter, I find it to be a double-edged sword. I want everyone to see… and yet, I don’t want anyone to see. Sometimes, all I really want, all I really need, is an outlet to mass-communicate my rawest emotions on a medium where no one is guaranteed to see it.
So…yes; with this project, I admit to being yet another self-dissecting 20-something. But I was programmed this way, and I have discovered a lot of important things as a result. This is about being honest with myself, regardless of all outside influences. This isn’t for you or for them, this is for me. It’s a time capsule. How will I feel tomorrow? In a week? a month? A year? Only time will tell.

Sunday, March 6, 2011

Day 6: One of the strangest fears I have is of

veins, tendons, and anything remotely like them.   

I can hardly stand to look at them on myself. 
          The way they emboss their way though my skin; that eerie bluish tint... it makes me feel faint. Sweeping my hand over them makes my skin crawl. I have no idea why I am so queasy about an anatomical part of the body, or when it started. The main problem areas: my wrists, of course, as well as the backs of my knees, the crook of my arms, the base of my neck just between my collarbones, and most of all: my Achilles tendon. A few years ago, I had a nightmare that I was jogging in the woods and the side of my leg felt a little strange. I didn't look down, but as I swept my hand over it, I felt something protruding and I knew exactly what it was. In this dream, a vein felt like a partially-cooked spaghetti noodle, and it was looping out from under my skin. Lord knows how this would even be possible. I woke up with a fluttering pulse and clenched fists.           

Who knew I could be afraid of something that belongs to me?
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2 comments:

  1. KateMarch 6, 2011 at 1:46 PM

    LOL. Yesterday was all about "keeping it real"! Veins are the highways of life :)

    ReplyDelete
  2. +mollyMarch 6, 2011 at 4:40 PM

    This comment has been removed by the author.

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